Start Making $____ Today

From a Gmail targeted ad:

Fool.com: The Motley Fool - Start Making $67,000 Today - 50 minutes ago

It occurs to me that one can "Start Making" any amount of money on any given day. All one has to do is make some of that money.

I'm going to "Start Making" a million dollars today, by going to work and adding ca. $50 to my paycheck.

Also, I get a lot of targeted Gmail ads from Web sites containing the word "fool," like "coffeefool.com." Is there a hidden message here? What does Google think of me?

P.S. Multiple posts today are attempted make-up from hungover day off yesterday.

P.P.S. Also prepare for video content to start leaking from the paintcans (full of lead).

I am gonna insist that we can, but I'm not gonna insist that we won't.

Look at the Big Tymers. LOOK AT THEM!

I was going to launch into a big-time joke about a Cash money records spinoff of the Big Tymers called the Egg Tymers, but basically the joke ends there, kind of like when people mention that the Akon song "Don't Matter" sounds exactly like "Remix to Ignition." There's just not that much else to kick around; unless you're Dave Barry or something, you're not going to brainstorm multiple punchlines about a song being the same as another, and the same holds true with Egg Tymers. Maybe you could use Photoshop (by the way is Photoshop the Kleenex of picture-editing software? Holler if you know what the Puffs would be [What if we called Kleenex Puffs? {What if Jesus were eaten by zombies?}]) to graft some eggs onto the necks of Baby Williams and Mannie Fresh. Maybe you could even make a video about the Egg Tymers, using re-tooled lyrics and clever trick photography to create a new rap group whose main concern was eggs, or the fact that their heads were eggs/egg timers, or both, or neither.

You probably shouldn't, but you probably can't resist.

That is the substance of Water and Vegetables.

Release the Bees

Why are the bees leaving?

-Too Busy
-Killer bees killing bees
-Hilary Swank not yet called upon to investigate
-Stuffy WASP culture
-Actually bad at spelling, embarrassed
-All New Songs!


NYT

Just Add Water

Centuries ago, before blogriculture became systematized, before bloggers were using growth hormones on their products, before chemical additives and pesticides, a man simply hoed his own blog and, at the end of the day, returned to his family to enjoy the fruits of his labor.

Those were simpler times, when a man could see exactly where his blogs were coming from. Sun, soil, and water. That was all it took back then, and although those homegrown blogs lacked the waxy shine of today's industrial produce, they tasted of the grit and earth from whence they came.

Nowadays, an entire daily allotment of blogs can be produced, shipped, and consumed in a matter of minutes. But at what price? Entire families blog in front of the television, setting their blogs on carefully designed disposable trays. The modern blogstyle —- certainly convenient —- nevertheless lacks the rustic charm of the old days.

That's where Water and Vegetables comes to the rescue. Our posts are one hundred percent shade-grown in their natural blogospheres, without the use of pesticides or additives. We pride ourselves on giving strict attention to fair labor practices, and each of our bloggers receives a decent living wage.

Water and Vegetables, the organic blog you can trust.